The glorious and triumphant return of now-19 year old Blogger, the revival of a once-grand and dare I say influential webspace that produced daily content, and the crippling anxiety of a young woman who no longer has any time or motivation to write, and feels like any ability she had acquired in the past through repetition and sheer will alone is now slowly slipping out of her grasp. Brief history of the Blog and Blogger can be found here.

Here be personal journal entries, observations, slices of life, questions and conclusions, as well as exploration of social and political topics seen through the lens of a Malaysian Muslim, feminist, lesbian, Marxist, and horse enthusiast.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Wednesday's My Day Off

Two weeks ago was SAEYLS week and there's no morning in which I felt less like waking up. There was no Assembly and Khairina and I had volunteered to help with that Physics thing. We spent the whole morning basically running around the school working on our experiments and trying to find our Physics teacher. Since our experiments involved neither sparkly glitter nor all that much water, our neck of the woods was considered less visited. The people of SAEYLS looked like they were having fun and I can't say the same, of course, because I was bored out of my mind. This one dude said I was doing good just because I could explain the basic concepts behind the colors of black and white. What a compliment, I tell ya. All extra curricular activities were cancelled that day, and Pn. Mages was kind enough to lend me her phone so I could call someone to pick me up.

I don't know much about what happened on Tuesday. I'm guessing that that was the day we all played Frisbee during PE and I suck at it and only managed to catch the thing twice and please someone, never let me throw one of those things again? There was a frog and I and some other people got it to hop onto a Frisbee and we carried it around until it hopped back down. Maybe that didn't even happen on that Tuesday. 

When I got home from Accounts, I fell asleep from the sheer pain of my stomach cramps. That was the worst cramp I've had to date. So cashing in on that, I didn't go to school the next day. It was quite boring. I mostly did my homework since I woke up early. Read some fanfiction. Maybe that was the day I started reading Wicked but I can't be sure. Elia texted me that this one teacher was pissed at me for not coming to school because I supposedly had to go to a public speaking thing on Thursday while I had already made it absolutely clear that I had a YE workshop that day. I don't know. It doesn't seem all that big of a deal now that I'm weeks away from it, but at the time, it was hella annoying for my complex. And going to that stupid school, you start to develop a complex.

Thursday was Leadership Workshop for YE. Honestly? I loved it. I mean, hanging around with people from my school's great and all, and Finance Workshop was cool, but for Leadership, I got to like talk to other people and while our group was all girls and that made breaking the ice a little bit harder, I just really had a good time, okay? I got to talking with people from my group and this Thursday is FedEx Workshop, so I'm super happy to see them again. I don't really want to mention their names because I don't know if I'll spell them correctly and my, what an embarrassment spelling errors would be.

Nisa came to my house after. We painted.

Friday, Hanna came over to my house because she wanted to walk to school to pick up shirts for SFS. It started raining and my mother started complaining but we ended up walking in the drizzle with an umbrella and anyways, halfway there, it stopped raining, basically. When we got to school, Ashwini said the shirts would be arriving at seven that evening, and God knows we weren't waiting around for that. Not that it was, you know, any of my actual business. This was Hanna's business. The walk home was more eventful if only because this gardener dude from the park hollered at us and started to somewhat stalk us. I walked faster. Sabrina Ho's mother stopped her car and asked us if we were going anywhere far and if we wanted a ride. I guess it started to rain a bit then. A few minutes later, I kind of regretted not accepting that offer because seriously, that gardener guy was creepy. And then there was this van that basically careened in our general directions and they rolled down the windows and hollered at us to be careful in a creepy, "What are you two girls doing walking all by yourselves?" way.

Hanna went home soon after. And that night, I found out I lost my SFS tickets. I guess these little things work in mysterious ways. Tickets go missing when they discover they're not much wanted in the first place. But on the bright side, if you want something hard enough and you shed enough tears, I think it's safe to assume that you can get anything you set your mind to. Case in point, my totally not wanting to walk during SFS. Khairina asked me whether I'd relieve her of her stall-guarding duties since she wanted to attach herself to her boyfriend. I said yes. Win win.

With all the hullabaloo regarding SFS which was two weeks ago or something, the event ended up being pretty boring. I was bored, most people were bored, and those who had fun, well, we know your type. No envy there, dude. Just a massive headache on most days. That didn't make sense but in my defense, I haven't written anything in two weeks, give or take.

Stall-guarding and the actual selling portion of the day was uneventful. I always thought to myself, hey, what if we only earned twenty bucks each or less from this? Because the tickets to the event was twenty bucks. And hey, guess what, we earned something like that per person so the basic gist of it is, if we hadn't wasted money on the drinks and the tickets, we'd be all the more richer and all the more capable to pay not only for camp fees (of which there seems to be no changes made upon) and the prefects t-shirt.

SFS, in essence, was uneventful. I went home early. I saw some people and towards the end mostly hung around Nisa and Nadiah, not that that's an accurate measure of actual time because I ended up going home at eleven or so. That was it. After everything, after an internal riot, that was it.

Not with a bang but with a whimper (I fell asleep when I got home and I stayed asleep and that's it, really). The next part of the weekend was Sunday and I really should have something to say regarding that day but I think I've exhausted myself trying to think of things to say but not really coming up with words that round off everything accurately so I'm not going to try. I'm going to take a step back. There was a sort of get-together, just because Nicolette decided she was bored and wanted to have people over since her siblings were all away at some camp or another. I took a seven minute break because I don't know what to write anymore so let the silence speak for itself (get it, Zaza, get it?).

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