The glorious and triumphant return of now-19 year old Blogger, the revival of a once-grand and dare I say influential webspace that produced daily content, and the crippling anxiety of a young woman who no longer has any time or motivation to write, and feels like any ability she had acquired in the past through repetition and sheer will alone is now slowly slipping out of her grasp. Brief history of the Blog and Blogger can be found here.

Here be personal journal entries, observations, slices of life, questions and conclusions, as well as exploration of social and political topics seen through the lens of a Malaysian Muslim, feminist, lesbian, Marxist, and horse enthusiast.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Two Breakfasts

I had to wake up early on Monday for Blue House aerobics practice. Pn. Rachel is crazy so, of course, we had to crawl up to school at the crack of dawn on a holiday (eight a.m.). I don't think anyone was happy about that, given that there were only about half a dozen of us. Everything aside, though, it was somewhat productive, and Intan and Sam got to practice their own PE class aerobics routine a couple of times as well. They say that the reason we're not moving up in the world is because of corruption. Maybe it's just lack of imagination, you know, seeing as every year, we do nothing but aerobics and handball during PE. Maybe corruption as well, because, you know, where is that damn swimming pool, now?

I saw Nadiah and I was like, "Nadiah! Bio!" but she was like "What?" and left. I think, I don't know if this is just me here, I may have grown up learning different values, but I'm pretty sure that if someone screamed up at me in a frenzied manner, that that person's trying to tell me something important, and if I didn't hear what that person had to say, I might have either a) asked her to repeat what she said and attempted to hear her properly for there isn't exactly a sound barrier in the school Gallery or b) answered one of her numerous texts. I don't know, it might have been nice for Nisa to text as well, saying something along the lines of, "I'm going to Hong Kong," or, "I'm not going to Hong Kong." I very much want to beat them to a pulp with my passive aggressive blog posts. Alas, I don't live in a perfect world. On my CV, I'm going to include "having to deal with absolute shitheads as Bio group members."

So that was annoying. But I have other pressing matters to deal with (actually, as of right now, I do not. I have finished all my homework other than the ones that I need other peoples' help with and so far, everything's cleared off the table except for Bio. Can I plead absolute shitheads for group members as a valid excuse to just forget about this thing?). After practice, when we were driving Intan back to her house, we decided to drop in on Raihan for a surprise. She was home (not that she answered her phone or anything - we called her maid) (and, you know what? People should just not be allowed to have phones period if they're not going to fucking use it, I mean, for the love of God) but asleep so we sort of knocked, but there was no response on the other side. So her maid took the keys (scary, actually, if you think about it) and unlocked the door and we were like "Surprise!" Raihan was actually supposed to go to Genting that day with her cousin or something, but our appearance made that impossible. Oh, well.

So, I had had breakfast before, but Raihan offered nasi lemak and cookies so who am I to refuse, really? I'm becoming one of those people who... no, wait, I've always never refused free stuff before; food, clothes, books, the odd bits and ends, you name it, I'll take it if it's free. We talked during our semi-breakfast (Intan refused free food - she did have a cookie, though. Those cookies were good.) and maybe ended up deciding to either go to the park or Intan's house. So, no shower, Raihan hopped out the door with a Goddamn cap on and we walked to Intan's, plans of the park forgotten. Intan's house was actually farther than I thought it would be. Raihan confessed to that being the first time she walked on the roads without her maid. Wow. You think you live a sheltered life and then someone like Raihan comes along, you know?

At Intan's, she was reluctant to let us stay in her room for more than a few minutes, which I personally don't get. It's not like it's haunted or ugly or a mess (it was kind of a mess) and it's not like we judged (we didn't, I swear). But we ended up in the "hangout room" which is kind of a freaky name to name a room, if you asked me, and we attempted to karaoke but failed for the most part and then I had to go home and it started raining and here's to hoping Raihan got home safe and sound even though it's already Wednesday now.

That afternoon, there was practice as usual and I won't bore you with the common details other than the fact that on Friday, we're going to get our costumes and, really, it's the only reason I decided to forego stagework in the first place. I am not as immensely excited as I thought I would be. Maybe this needs more time to mull over. Or maybe it's because I haven't been talking to people recently during practices, and for the most part, I sort of just stick to the shadows and read if they don't require my immediate assistance or attention. Well, can't blame me for being super efficient and arranging everything by the third week. We've been done ages. Just waiting for them actors to memorize their lines and then we can do proper rehearsals.

There should be a better way to end this post.

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