The glorious and triumphant return of now-19 year old Blogger, the revival of a once-grand and dare I say influential webspace that produced daily content, and the crippling anxiety of a young woman who no longer has any time or motivation to write, and feels like any ability she had acquired in the past through repetition and sheer will alone is now slowly slipping out of her grasp. Brief history of the Blog and Blogger can be found here.

Here be personal journal entries, observations, slices of life, questions and conclusions, as well as exploration of social and political topics seen through the lens of a Malaysian Muslim, feminist, lesbian, Marxist, and horse enthusiast.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Kevin's Girl

My initials (both EJ and HJ) for Mylo Xyloto artwork thing at Coldplay's website. Pretty.

I'm not really in much of a mood to write but then I saw that a lot of people checked out this blog today and it's a wonder really. I mean, why would you even want to? But I guess that's just some people. Besides, the storm's coming, so might as well write something before thunder and lightning make it impossible for me to get Internet connection. 

So, essentially, I had six things I had wanted to accomplish for the holidays, with the unmentioned seventh being 'go out every day and stop being such a homebody'. Let's see how all seven of those plans panned out (or fell through), shall we? (The holidays aren't a hundred percent over, of course. We have Friday and the weekend to look forward to but I don't think it's much to look forward to, anyways, considering the fact that we'll all be back to school on Monday).

1. Plan out my Nanowrimo 
Prefects camp is going to get in the way of Nanowrimo-writing for sure so I was thinking that maybe I'd start writing three days earlier to make up for it? It's been on my post-PMR list for ages - plan out my story - but I never seem to get in the mood. If it continues this way, I might just not do Nanowrimo at all. I mean, I had a great idea and all (epistolary fiction because I've been reading so many epistolary works lately and I just sort of fell in love with how you could say so much with just... documents. Plus, I could write as freely as I wanted; like, I could write a blog post within the story, or a letter, e-mail, those everyday things) but time (or rather, my mood) hasn't been on my side. 

2. Book club
I spent a lot of time just staring at the book club page and getting worked up over acquiring the book. We're reading American Gods by Neil Gaiman. I've never really been a fan of the way he writes but damn if his books aren't wonderfully plotted and intriguing (I've actually only ever some short stories and Good Omens before, and the latter's only because of Terry Pratchett). Other than that, we could have chosen these books from Ellie's list: The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time by Mark Haddon (which I've seen around plenty of times and wanted to buy just a few weeks ago but was short of money - I didn't choose it because while it sounded interesting and was my second pick, I'd rather choose American Gods), The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho (I've read it), Paper Towns by John Green (I've read it and John Green books are something that I'd rather enjoy all by myself without the pressure of having to talk about it to other people), and Going Bovine by Libba Bray (I don't like sick people who are going to die).

Hanna dragged herself into book club. Nisa and I both agree that she doesn't seem like the type of girl who reads books but that's stereotyping, something which I've been trying to avoid doing a lot this year, so I'll let this pass and Hanna can have her cake and eat it as well (she did. She really, really did). Other than the additional addition, things seem to be going well. I tried Torrenting American Gods yesterday for laughs and since it seemed like a ghost town down that download, I thought there was no way it was going to download (much less download in less than half an hour) but don't make snap judgments! So I got an online copy (I downloaded two - the .pdf download was moving but it was too slow) and saved it in Word, separated, and Hanna uploaded it to Wattpad or something so now everyone's happy and no one has to worry. Least of all me. 'Cause I already went ahead and bought the book, anyways.

3. Project Nadiah
It's even better than four of my other apology mix CDs. I didn't exactly put that much effort in it, although Hanna says it comes off as something which I did put a lot of effort in, because I remember stressing out more about Hanna's and Nisa's mixes (even though I didn't really arrange theirs properly, as one should always do for a mix. I sort of got the songs and threw them together like a soup without a recipe) but I can't say I'm not proud of it. I'm very proud of it. I am far too proud of it, I don't even want to give it to her. It's too pretty and it includes some of my very favorite songs ever and plus, I put in a piano piece I played in it because it was 11 PM on a Tuesday and I had nothing better to do.

4. Dip toes in next year's syllabus 
Well, that was the plan, anyways. I got my Dad to buy me the books but I haven't even cracked them open yet. There will be time, I've decided. There is no rush.

5. Work on stuff in my room
Like my book shelf, my shelf-shelf and my cork board and whiteboard. I have added a border to my cork board and stapled pages of an old Time magazine as the background and it looks brand new and ready to hang now. Although we haven't really gotten around to actually hanging it up, the cork board and the whiteboard. This weekend, perhaps, after my Dad pays a visit to the hardware store? Same with the regular shelf that I recently bought, which I'm placing under the whiteboard at the foot of my bed (oh, I rearranged my room. It was super weird and trippy at first - I kept thinking that I had walked in some alternate reality version of my room and getting overly excited that alternate realities existed before actual reality came crashing down - but I've gotten used to it now and I'd like to think it looks rather nice.); Ikea didn't include any screws for that one.

But my bookshelf! Oh, my bookshelf! It looks so bare and kind of useless, actually. I've only decided to put up the recent books that I bought (of which there aren't many), my magazines (ditto) and my Harry Potter books on the top shelf so there's still tons of space left. I can't wait for it to start to fill up. I mean, when they first built the built-in bookshelf at the corner of my table, I thought it looked slightly empty, too, because God knows I lost a lot of books during the move out, move back in, but now it's... well, I needed to buy a new bookshelf, so that probably speaks for itself. Also, the bookshelf that I bought is Ikea's Billy, which is (incidentally) what Sabrina has as well! Ah, serendipity!

6. Unnamed project that doesn't seem to be moving anywhere
It doesn't seem to be moving anywhere. I don't know. I need to talk to Helena about it, so maybe I'll do that tomorrow. And I also need to talk to Elia, see if she wants anything to do with it, but other than that, I'm stumped. Getting a piece of Dan's time (he's the main person I need to talk to to make the project work) is a luxury I don't think I can afford, not even with Skype and etc. So I really don't know where this is going, or even whether it's going at all. Only time will tell. It's not quite on right now, though, and it might never be on. 

7. Go out every day and stop being such a homebody 
Every time I use the word 'homebody', I can't help but read it as homeboy, so it's just plain weird. Went to Singapore and Johor during the weekend (or maybe I should have phrased that as Johor and Singapore, instead? Does it matter? It does to me, apparently), so I don't have to explain that one. I think I went somewhere on Monday with my parents but for some reason, I can't remember. Maybe I didn't? But there was Drama and I was present and it was a bunch of doing nothing (well, doing something or another, if you know what I mean) (but since I didn't tell you, of course you don't know what I mean. Pretend I'm waggling my eyebrows right now). That was fun. Doing nothing. It's exactly how I imagined my post-PMR days would go like. One of the rare instances in my life in which something happens exactly as I had imagined and planned it to. I did some more planning and "shopping around" for my future house. Helena was sleeping next to me. It felt very... comfortable. It felt very nice.

On Tuesday, I went out with Hanna. She suggested we go to Citta mall because she recommended this cafe place. Basically we hung out at the cafe for four hours (twelve until four) and had coffee (well, I did), lunch, and cake (well, Hanna did). Gosh, what did we even talk about? A lot of shit. It was... honestly my favorite hang-out with Hanna ever. It felt so nice and natural and God, if we lived somewhere else in the future, as in another country, and with some twist of luck (or God's fate), we end up in the same country, we would have to do this all the time. Twenty-four seven if I could it my way. 

On Wednesday, I got a call from Helena saying that Debbie's in town. Best. Call. Ever. I haven't seen Debbie in ages and she's changed a lot. She's more of a Debbie Downer now and not exactly in a bad way. We tried searching for American Gods in Subang Parade's MPH but no luck. So we hung out at Starbucks and prank called some people and while I won't say it was like old times (more awkward pauses, especially with Debbie, because she obviously Doesn't Know and Hel and I can't just say whatever we want to say in front of her. I felt bad but it's not exactly something you'd want to go around being public knowledge, even if it is with such a great old friend like Debbie Downer). Then my parents came and we were about to head home and you wouldn't guess what happened next, you invisible, might-as-well-be-nonexistent reader, you.

I saw Nisa! Well, that was weird and awkward and I don't like surprises one bit (shout out to Nisa's English paper for PMR!). But we made our plans for today. Today Nisa and I went to Gardens (Hanna was invited but she had family plans). Nisa's mother wouldn't let her wander around alone for some reason so my mother tagged along and spent her time book browsing, eating and probably fielding calls from all of those angry parents over at her nursery (the children came down with a serious and catchy bout of hand, foot and mouth disease). I found American Gods in Borders. Well, Nisa did. It was awesome. Thank God for friends! It was the annoying size Ellie described it being but I don't really mind. Jodi Picoult books are more annoying (physically).

We met up with Damia, Meetra and Divyia (who had been trying to call me beforehand to ask us whether we were going to join them to watch Paranormal Activity... whichever movie it's on now, but I couldn't hear what was going on on the other end of the line so I asked Nisa to take the call and someone ended up hanging up on someone so they didn't get tickets for us; the queue was too long by the time we got there. Nisa and I ended up not watching the movie, but I could have just as easily explained all of this outside of a bracket, now, couldn't I?). They were eating at Alexis. So we saw them, went in... and all the waiters were just sort of staring at us. 

It turns out that because of the cost of the food, Damia, Meetra and Divyia had ordered one plate of pasta and some fries (the water's free!) and they split the pasta around and... it was hilarious. Nisa ordered some meringue (Divyia encouraged her to do it by saying that it would make us seem "less stingy". The waiter came and gave us all forks!). The bill totaled up to 75. Meetra had a crush on the waiter. She asked him to autograph a tissue paper. I think I lost my favorite pen ever but it doesn't matter now, does it, I mean, PMR's over. The waiter's name is Kevin and we later on stopped by again to stalk him. 

And that's number seven and with that, this list has come to a close!

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