The glorious and triumphant return of now-19 year old Blogger, the revival of a once-grand and dare I say influential webspace that produced daily content, and the crippling anxiety of a young woman who no longer has any time or motivation to write, and feels like any ability she had acquired in the past through repetition and sheer will alone is now slowly slipping out of her grasp. Brief history of the Blog and Blogger can be found here.

Here be personal journal entries, observations, slices of life, questions and conclusions, as well as exploration of social and political topics seen through the lens of a Malaysian Muslim, feminist, lesbian, Marxist, and horse enthusiast.

Thursday, March 17, 2011


My blog has been terribly boring lately, partly due to the lack of posts, which is partly due to the lack of interest, which is partly due to the fact that I have this whole mountain of homework (coursework) to do and yet I have no idea how to do anything despite having discussed it multiple times with my friends and having the teacher explain shit to me up front while I doze off in the back during every single lesson. And you know what? It doesn't matter if they explained things one time or a thousand times, it never made sense in the first place. I don't know why we got saddled with this MBPJ shit this year while all they had to do was take pictures of their Eid holidays last year. I mean, what the fuck?

What was I talking about? Oh, right, my lack of rights to own a blog. Yeah, right, so to add to the giant pile of boring that is Psychotic Justice, I'll blog about American Idol. Now, I know what you're not thinking. Why is this girl still watching Idol when all she can do half the time is complain about it? I mean, God knows I've told people who whine and trash on Glee within the fandom to just fuck off but with AI it's different. It's so much different because a) it's actually a very interesting show and, to me at least, raises questions about power, control, the media and basically all the themes of the Hunger Games series, and b) there are people like Lauren Alaina on it, and she's just a ball to discover. She should be on the Discovery Channel, have her own little documentary. I would watch that. I would pay to watch that, actually.

Tonight they sing songs from the year they were born or something? I wasn't really paying attention but I can assure you, I did listen to most of the performances. Naima starts off the night and I remember hating her singing Umbrella because, um, I don't know, like the song itself wasn't already stupid, you'd want to arrange it into something even more dumb? I try to like Naima so much because she seems like just the loveliest person (the loveliest girl on Idol at the moment) but sadly, singing What's Love Got to Do With It doesn't make me like her any more.

I didn't listen to Paul but I heard he was unwell so get well soon. Thia sang Colors of the Wind and I just hope she gets out of here. I mean, she's so young (haha, look at me, saying something like that; hell, I'm the same age as her) and I don't want her to undergo all the pressures Idol contestants have had to go through. I know the reason these people audition for Idol is because they want the fame, want recognition and all the things that entails but I just hope Thia goes out this week and fade into the background. Who the hell thought this girl was ready? She's not. She has the emotional range of a teaspoon and while her voice is pleasant, she just keeps on choosing these dumb old ballads that makes people fall asleep. And the saddest part is that I don't think her voice would be suited to singing anything other than that.

I didn't watch James Durbin's performance, nor did I hear it because I was downstairs getting food to bring upstairs to watch the rest of the show so I don't really want to get into it but I read that he was, once again, sporting a tail. Hm, well, I guess I can sound as ignorant as I'd like because This Is My Blog™, but I don't care if that thing is a fashion statement or something that those James Durbin-like people actually like to wear on a day to day basis, it looks stupid. And it looks like a tail. And also, I found out he sang I'll Be There For You. Crap, now I want to give a listen. YouTube it later. Anyways, Haley (is that how you spell it?) up next and she painted her lips in the worst shade of red possible for her complexion because she looks like she's older than usual (and crazier than usual). Kind of like someone suffering through menopause. What kind of song what? Why? And also, what key is that supposed to be? Why? (Can she please get out?)

Stefano doesn't have a bad voice and at least he's got consistency going for him so they can't exactly pull the "Who are you? What kind of artist are you?" crap on him but on the flip side, he sounds the same in every single song he does. Pia sang next and that's when I really started to look at the TV screen instead of just listening because I have finished my dinner. First off, she has this really nice voice and I just love listening to her but I hope she gets shipped home anyways because I don't care about her at all. Don't care about her story or her song choices and when she gets up on stage, I literally just cease to care about anything. Secondly, it was the first time I saw Jennifer Lopez tonight, or rather Jennifer Lopez's hair and I nearly choked on my drink. Oh, I had to go back and do this because I forgot all about Scotty. I don't think I'll be watching any of his performances anymore unless he decides to do, like, rock or pop punk or something because at least then, it would be a surprise. 

Karen wants to prove to everyone that she's not just the Latina Idol Chick. Well, too bad. Love Will Lead You Back, after that Selena song last week, was kind of like the final straw, don't you think, America? I mean, who would vote for her? That's a little mean, I guess, but I just want her to get off the stage. Forever. Why are all these talented girls putting people to sleep with their terrible renditions of semi-terrible, semi-classic songs? Casey... um. Um. I'm sorry, my brain is still on the floor! I want to insert so many exclamation points but I can't, because then I'd look stupid, right? Does it even matter that he got screamy screechy? What matters is that he did it. He did that song and- and, just, wow, balls, much, right? 

The funny thing about Lauren Alaina is that when we first heard of her in the auditions, she's just this girl with a big voice. But now she's a country singer. Food for thought. Also, Mrs. Alaina. That is all I'm going to say. Onto Jacob's performance, I love it as a show-closer, not so much as a performance itself. The up-and-down-ness of his voice didn't work so well for this song as it had in the past but it was actually good because of the fact that he's good and as a plus, he didn't butcher the song (God knows it's been done and redone so many times on Idol by now). 

I watched the thing at the end and let's see who I missed out... Paul looked drunk but at least he sounded OK for a sick person and I actually like James' performance. I'm kind of ashamed to admit the latter but whatever. It's my life. 

Also, This Is My Blog™ and this has been an American Idol post. I am looking forward to tomorrow's elimination episode to find out which girl has been given the boot. 

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