The glorious and triumphant return of now-19 year old Blogger, the revival of a once-grand and dare I say influential webspace that produced daily content, and the crippling anxiety of a young woman who no longer has any time or motivation to write, and feels like any ability she had acquired in the past through repetition and sheer will alone is now slowly slipping out of her grasp. Brief history of the Blog and Blogger can be found here.

Here be personal journal entries, observations, slices of life, questions and conclusions, as well as exploration of social and political topics seen through the lens of a Malaysian Muslim, feminist, lesbian, Marxist, and horse enthusiast.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Eat, Sleep, Love

  • Since our class won the title of Cleanest Class (of course), we got a fucking huge hamper and yesterday, Miss Foo came into our class and we started dividing up the booty. Yesterday was a really great day, all in all. It had a sort of finality to it, I don't know why, like it was the last day or something but it wasn't. Khairin gave out cupcakes that had '2 Gigih' on it. Basically, we ate in class all day. Last night, the family (me, Broski + family, parents and my sister) went out for dinner (the restaurant was deserted - we were the only people there) but I couldn't finish my steak and mushroom pie because the dish was drenched in gravy and after a while, I just felt like puking. This morning, my sister and I headed to Subang Parade and we had cake and danishes and coffee for breakfast before heading over to Empire a few hours later for a really heavy lunch. I just feel like upchucking everything I ate.
  • Nowadays, all you ever do at school is play card games with UNO cards and read storybooks. Since I don't really like card games (even though I'm somewhat good at most of them) (because I cheat) and every time I try to go past a page of my Horrible Histories book on WWI my eyes start to droop, I pushed together three chairs and went on to have a glorious half-an-hour nap. Went home and took another nap until my Dad pounded on the door at 8 and told me it was time to go out. Oh. I wasn't in a good mood all through the dinner out because I was still sleepy so when I got home, I headed straight for bed, jeans and all. The good thing is, I woke up this morning, well rested, and not at all moody or snappy. Good nights are good
  • Just because I tell you everything and you know everything there is to know does not mean you can judge what I do. I think it was pretty presumptuous for you to think the worst of me because you don't even know the full story. Actually, I told you everything but you don't understand anything. So, really, whatever problems I have with her are between me and her, none of your fucking business. You can't tell me what to do when it concerns her because you don't even know half of it and whatever happened between me and her doesn't change the fact that I still know her. So you don't get to say that I'm a bad person because of what I chose to do because at the end of the day, you have no clue what I'm doing nor the motivation behind it.
My outfit for Harry Potter and Deathly Hallows night is complete. The plans are made and the people have confirmed their attendance. I have three plans lined up and while I wish I could twist a few things around and pull a few strings, I'm still quite happy with how things are. All I need now is a black marker pen and I'll be on my way. 

I also got some things from the trip out with my sister. It was a pretty sweet trip, I gotta admit. I'm also going out to the library with my Dad and lunch with Hel tomorrow so it looks like my weekend's not only eventful, it's going to be a hell of a time, too. 

I've been really sad, lately. I don't want the year to end. Whatever that's happened, I still don't regret doing anything, not really. However many people I've hurt or been hurt by, it doesn't really matter because I still am where I am right now at the end of the day, depressed and dreading the day when I can no longer call myself a 2 Gigihan. Whatever faults I found in the class at the beginning of the year, I liked being in it. Whatever problems I had with the teachers, I got through it and now look! I got second in class and third in the whole form (I'll accept congratulations in the form of boxes of chocolates or packets of Famous Amos cookies) and overall, my grades are pretty good. 

It's been a pretty good year. 

No comments:

Post a Comment